Confidence is definitely a very attractive characteristic. When you are are self- confident, you are able to trust your own judgement, skills and abilities. You believe in yourself and you do not need others to validate you because you know your worth.
As women we can often encounter people who may try to make us feel less worthy than what we actually are. This can be noticed in different fields of our everyday life. On a more global scale, the difference of salary between men and women in work places can illustrate it: same job, same responsibilities but, paid less. We may also face some sexists remarks which can hit our confidence, especially when we hear them so often that they become banalized. For, instance, the comments received on our bodies, as if our own body belonged to everyone else: "oh you are too skinny", or "of you are too fat"... "What about you mind your own business?" is clearly something we all felt like saying at least once in our lives. Moreover, we have the double standards. For example, when a man is showing authority we see him as the boss. On the opposite, the woman will be seen as bossy.
I believe that self- confidence can help us not being too touched by the different unproductive critics that we can receive by people who may try to tear us down because, themselves lack confidence and need to elevate themselves to feel good and important. Therefore, I want to share with you some tips to boost your self- confidence and self- esteem.
Positive vibes only
When we feel down and,as if there is no way out of a difficult situation, we tend to start being surrounded by a negative energy and forget that there is actually a way out of this situation. It is important not to forget to be nice to ourselves by telling ourselves positives words such as "it is going to be ok", or "it is not that deep"... Of course, it is sometimes way more easier to say than to apply.
A way out of it is sometimes to imagine how happy you will be once this difficult situation is over. How relieved you will be when you realize that all the effort you have put to find your way through actually worked. In fact, the way we think truly impact the way we live because of the vision that we have of ourselves and the way we see the world. Do not see the world like a box full of obstacles, but see it as a big adventures full of opportunities. Do not limit yourself because of what others think or because of your own fear. In fact, take this fear "and throw it away", as my mother use to say. See your difficulties as a way to grow stronger than ever and, to boost yourself. Thanks to those experiences your self- confidence will increase because next time you will know how to handle this situation or a similar one.
Therefore, forget about negative thoughts because you are amazing and you should tell you this everyday!
Body language
Your body language is very important because it sometimes speak more than words or adds value to them. The way you carry yourself reflects the kind of person you are. The posture you adopt when you walk and talk to others has a huge impact on how people see you.
For instance, in the legal field, a lawyer has to show confidence to prove to the client that he or she can trust his or her lawyer with the case.
So keep your head high and walk like a Queen!
Stop comparing yourself to others
I know that with all the social media and the new body standards that we have over the years it is difficult to appreciate who we are and what we have. We see perfect bodies and we start wondering why we are not looking the same. Jealousy does not bring any productivity. Therefore, it is important to learn how to appreciate who we are and what we have. Focus on what you like about yourself. it can be your smile, your humour... Compliment yourself on how you look but also on what you achieve.
"Jealousy is just a lack of self- confidence"
So, now when you go on your social media and you look at those pictures, ask yourself the question of wether or not you are happy when you look at them or if they make you feel bad in your own skin. You must fix your own beauty standards and embrace what makes you so unique. Even, for myself, it took time to understand how good it was to be different and to stand out in my own way. You end up shining for who you are and, the actions you make around you and, not only for how you look. It is also important not to compare your capacities to others' capacities. Do not rush into a project or a business because, someone of your age already has her own salary while you do not. We all have our own rhythm.
The same way it is not necessary to compare yourself to people on social media, it is also very important not to do so with your close circle. Do not stay with people who will have a negative impact on your self- confidence and self esteem. You know those "friends" who are always making fun of you, comparing themselves to you and, end up making you feel as if they are better than you? Well, their toxic behavior around you will have a nocif effect on you. People reacting like that have generally a lack of confidence and are projecting those insecurities on others.
So, we say stop to those people who always have something negative to say about our physical appearance and choices in life.
Do not mix self- confidence and arrogance
Some people tend to get confuse between confidence and arrogance. We do not need to be arrogant to show that we have self- confidence. Arrogance could even reflect a lack of self- esteem and self- confidence. We are not superior to others because we are self- confident.
"Arrogance really comes from insecurity, and in the end our feeling that we are bigger than others is really the flip side of our feeling that we are smaller than others." Desmond Tutu
The main difference can be found in the fact that people who are arrogant are always looking for others' admiration and validation whereas self- confident people do not need others to acknowledge their value.
Comments